The frivolous news thread - for shitty news

**Satan** · 07-03-2012, 09:26 PM

Originally Posted by Hoser

Nicolas Sarkozy says France has too many foreigners

tek errrr jerrbs

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-17280647

You could say they are being invaded? heh

have you ever been to france?

I'm guessing not

**Hoser** · 07-03-2012, 09:28 PM

Originally Posted by Satan

have you ever been to france?

I'm guessing not

Fuck that it's full of French

**Satan** · 07-03-2012, 09:30 PM

if you go, you'll understand what he's talking about

**heist** · 07-03-2012, 09:33 PM

say what you will about the french, they're funny bastards

**c_avdas** · 07-03-2012, 09:45 PM

fuckin hate australia, it's full of fuckin white people

**Slurm** · 07-03-2012, 10:00 PM

Originally Posted by c_avdas

fuckin hate australia, it's full of fuckin white people

Haha exactly.

Besides, what is Sarkozy's ancestry?

Oh noes! Foreigners!

Europeans, especially the french, dutch and english, complaining about foreigners is a laugh-riot.

**littlegracie** · 09-03-2012, 10:49 AM

Shoppers crushed by 15ft Kate Moss

**Curare** · 09-03-2012, 02:09 PM

this may have already been posted, but I'm lazy and so am going pull a "nosaj"

http://www.theage.com.au/nsw/the-mag...309-1uoe9.html

either way, whaaa?

**nosaj D:** · 09-03-2012, 04:17 PM

Originally Posted by Curare

but I'm lazy and so am going pull a "nosaj"

It'll never catch on

**Curare** · 09-03-2012, 04:19 PM

Shut it Porch Monkey!

Hey, it's ok, I'm taking it back

**HunterM** · 12-03-2012, 04:11 PM

RUTHLESS

Title Stripped from Pokémon Champion Who Crapped in Hotel Hallway

Two-time Pokémon champion Ruben Puig Lecegui was stripped of his his title at the United Kingdom Video Game Championship following a scandal in which he and members of his team are accused of leaving their hotel rooms to take a shit in the hall.
"According to several eyewitness acounts," reports the site Pokébeach, Lecegui and members of his team "placed their own feces in the hallway of the hotel they and other Pokémon players were staying at." Pokébeach says the cops were called, the players were kicked out of the hotel and had to pay fines.
The manager of Play! Pokemon told Pokébeach that "The Pokémon Company International expects its players to maintain high standards of behaviour conducive to the family-friendly environment that we foster." The company investigated the matter independently and took action.
The event's original runner-up now is listed as the champion.

http://kotaku.com/5892300/title-stri...urce=pulsenews

**nosaj D:** · 19-03-2012, 01:24 PM

So someone died from getting tasered
http://www.perthnow.com.au/news/man-...-1226303531023

**monkey** · 28-03-2012, 09:28 PM

http://www.afl.com.au/news/newsartic...5/default.aspx

TROUBLED former footballer Ben Cousins has been released from police custody for the second time in two days, after being charged with alleged drug offences in Western Australia...

"He's been charged with possess methylamphetamine with intent to sell or supply," a police spokeswoman said.

**nosaj D:** · 28-03-2012, 09:50 PM

http://www.wired.co.uk/news/archive/...hicken-farming
I find this a little disturbing, and i doubt it's what the Wachowski brothers had in mind...

**heist** · 02-04-2012, 11:02 AM

SPOILER for Apprentice watchers:

We were outside selling our bullshit little jive guide books (the sandwich of this week). I gave the signal, and from blocks away, we could hear the parade. BMG with their giant drums, and confetti canons were changing traffic patterns in NYC. They arrived at the park where we were set up to sell our guidebooks. My business partner for my entire adult life, Teller, was in the parade, firing streamers into the air and dancing. Teller had the eyes of Keith Moon in the Who. I had been sequestered on The Celebrity Apprentice with all the complaining, backstabbing, and phony heart to heart talks, and down the street came joy. Pure joy. Honest human joy personified by Teller and Blue Man Group. I started to cry.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/penn-jillette/celebrity-apprentice-blue-man-group_b_1395411.html

**hitmonlee** · 03-04-2012, 06:52 AM

i've been watching celebrity apprentice and penn jillette is amazing. the article seems to contain spoilers about yesterdays episode though, so i will read that later.

**heist** · 03-04-2012, 10:18 AM

ah sorry, didn't think about spoilers!

**nosaj D:** · 05-04-2012, 02:52 PM

http://www.carsguide.com.au/blogs-an...lp_child_sleep
I don't understand. This is hurting my head
Can someone explain why you buy a Ferrari to get your kid to sleep in it?
Maybe the cocaine-laced cash really does make rich people crazy

**heist** · 05-04-2012, 02:56 PM

if youtube has taught me anything, it's that sheik's love doing crazy shit with their money

edit: also it's shitty journalism

he said he bought the car because the kid saw it in a catalogue, then discovered the kid falls asleep in it

not that he bought it /for/ the kid to sleep in.

**nosaj D:** · 05-04-2012, 02:57 PM

Don't be silly heist, the internet isn't for teaching - it's for porn

**heist** · 05-04-2012, 03:00 PM

and bitching about movies

**Mono Lisa** · 12-04-2012, 03:33 PM

http://au.news.yahoo.com/thewest/lif...les-with-love/

so glad i took the time to read this.

**Mono Lisa** · 03-05-2012, 03:32 PM

http://au.news.yahoo.com/thewest/a/-...rinking-craze/

**frisky** · 04-05-2012, 08:04 AM

Originally Posted by Mono Lisa

http://au.news.yahoo.com/thewest/lif...les-with-love/
so glad i took the time to read this.

Article useless without picks

**nosaj D:** · 05-05-2012, 01:29 PM

A rare and endangered drop bear has been killed crossing the road
http://news.ninemsn.com.au/world/846...-crossing-road

**AngryJungMan** · 23-05-2012, 01:03 PM

..not exactly frivolous for those involved, but the following quote cracked me up just then - tis luke pomersbach's dad talking about his son's current troubles in india:

"he's waiting patiently. there's a feeling of helplessness. he's like han solo at this stage."

india has carbonite technology?!@

**Hoser** · 23-05-2012, 04:08 PM

Gina Reinhard worlds richest woman now worth 29 bazillion dollarz (more than you)

http://www.watoday.com.au/executive-...523-1z4lb.html

**nosaj D:** · 27-05-2012, 07:54 PM

Naked man killed by police was 'eating' face off victim

HOLY FUCKBALLS THE ZOMBIES ARE COMING
http://www.miamiherald.com/2012/05/26/2818832/naked-man-shot-killed-on-macarthur.html#storylink=cpy

**nosaj D:** · 28-05-2012, 09:08 AM

http://news.ninemsn.com.au/world/847...-of-dead-uncle

**nosaj D:** · 30-05-2012, 10:31 AM

http://news.ninemsn.com.au/glancevie...e-burns.glance
shits and giggles yo

**Scorpius** · 31-05-2012, 11:44 AM

Great news for lovers of the Australian Beer

http://www.abc.net.au/news/2012-05-3...n-game/4042544

miss_p* · 01-06-2012, 01:30 AM

This is old but hoooooow did i miss it??

American cage fighter 'rips out still-beating heart of training partner after fearing he was possessed by the devil'
By PAUL THOMPSON
UPDATED: 08

9 EST, 1 June 2010
Share

WARNING: GRAPHIC CONTENT

Arrested: Jarrod Wyatt was allegedly found standing naked over his dead friend's body in a room bathed in blood
A U.S. cage fighter ripped out the heart of his training partner while he was still alive after becoming convinced he was possessed by the devil, it was alleged today.
Jarrod Wyatt also cut out Taylor Powell's tongue and ripped off most of his face in a brutal assault that police said looked like a scene from a horror film, officers said.
They claim they found the 26-year-old standing naked over his friend's body with parts, including an eyeball, strewn around the blood splattered room in Klamath, California.
Wyatt allegedly told police he had drunk a cup of tea spiked with hallucinogenic mushrooms and became convinced Powell was possessed.
According to an autopsy Powell, 21, bled to death after his heart was ripped out.
The coroner said Powell had been alive when the organ was ripped out after his chest had been sliced open with a knife.
Wyatt told the police he thrown the heart into a fire along with other organs that he had removed from the body, it was claimed.
He allegedly told investigators he cooked the body parts because he was fearful Powell was still alive and he ‘needed to stop the Devil’.
Police had been called to the grisly scene after a third friend had witnessed a sudden mood change in Wyatt after they had all ingested wild mushroom tea.
Justin Davis told police he returned to the flat to find Wyatt naked and covered from head to toe in blood.
He noticed an eyeball lying in the middle of the floor and saw Powell's mutilated body.
A lawyer representing Wyatt has claimed the wild mushrooms caused him to act in such a violent way and had not control over his actions.
‘My client was trying to silence the devil,’ said James Fallman.
‘I think he was having a psychotic fit based on the mushrooms he had.’
Wyatt has been charged with first degree murder and torture.
Prosecutors added the torture charge as Powell was still alive when his heart was removed.

**nosaj D:** · 01-06-2012, 02:29 AM

o.O
I don't think ripping the still-beating heart out of the possessed is on the Catholic church's check list when dealing w/possession.
I did not think something like mushies could push someone to behave in that way :/

miss_p* · 01-06-2012, 03:16 AM

Originally Posted by nosaj D:

o.O
I don't think ripping the still-beating heart out of the possessed is on the Catholic church's check list when dealing w/possession.
I did not think something like mushies could push someone to behave in that way :/

I totally agree. Can't say ive ever seen anyone on mushies ever behave in a violent manner.
Its pretty extreme

**golden_girl** · 01-06-2012, 09:11 AM

http://www.perthnow.com.au/news/shee...-1226378768136

this made me teary :'(

**nosaj D:** · 14-06-2012, 04:11 PM

http://news.ninemsn.com.au/national/...ugs-high-fives
Banning hi-5s and hugs...Sounds reasonable

**BLEGH!** · 15-06-2012, 10:11 AM

Not condoning bashing preggo woman but gives new meaning to 'get in the kitchen and make me a sammich!'.

http://news.ninemsn.com.au/national/...r-toast-jailed

....(waits for TS outrage and uproar)

miss_p* · 16-06-2012, 07:16 AM

Ok another little article I found that is not new. It compares the top ever songs for Triple J vs Rolling Stone.

http://www.stubbornmule.net/2010/06/...e-vs-triple-j/

What is your view on songs from the 80s? I really like the 'underground' stuff. A really great quad disc example was Left of the Dial Dispatches from the 80s Underground.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Left_of...0s_Underground

**Satan** · 21-06-2012, 04:52 PM

I shouldn't be shocked from such a low brow shitpaper but seriously WTF???

Brain hack save

YOUR thoughts are safe from other people, right? Wrong. Our reporter meats a 'mentalist' and the results will blow your mind.
See more

From the article:

"Remote viewing is getting kind of outside my body for a moment and trying to get underneath your butt cheeks."
Wow! Easy tiger, this is a family newspaper.
"The first thing I see - ha! - waxed, not shaved."

Read more: http://www.news.com.au/national/real...#ixzz1yPrNnAds

**Satan** · 21-06-2012, 04:53 PM

MEATS!!!!

**heist** · 25-06-2012, 11:36 AM

four out of our five EPA board members are close enough to the mining industry that they can't do their job

http://www.abc.net.au/news/2012-06-25/epa-chairman-makes-decision-on-browse-gas-hub/4090538?section=wa

**Scorpius** · 28-06-2012, 01:47 PM

So, just in case anyone had any doubts about the quality of "She who must not be named"'s set, see here:

http://blogs.miaminewtimes.com/cross...alls_video.php

**~Msv~** · 28-06-2012, 01:51 PM

Originally Posted by Scorpius

So, just in case anyone had any doubts about the quality of "She who must not be named"'s set, see here:

http://blogs.miaminewtimes.com/cross...alls_video.php

Im actually glad I cant view those videos at work.

**Scorpius** · 28-06-2012, 03:18 PM

Originally Posted by ~Msv~

Im actually glad I cant view those videos at work.

So am I, the descriptions alone are cringe-worthy.

**nosaj D:** · 30-06-2012, 02:53 AM

http://news.ninemsn.com.au/entertain...uana-in-norway
Lord have mercy, Snoop Dogg arrested for marijuana possession!

**The Biz** · 30-06-2012, 03:14 AM

Originally Posted by nosaj D:

http://news.ninemsn.com.au/entertain...uana-in-norway
Lord have mercy, Snoop Dogg arrested for marijuana possession!

Snoop must have misheard when someone told him to bring enough "Kroner"

**Scorpius** · 12-09-2012, 02:30 PM

http://www.news.com.au/entertainment...-1226472628548

**BLEGH!** · 03-10-2012, 04:12 PM

Total lolface!

http://www.fox8live.com/story/19708500/man-accused-of-attacking-wife-with-sandwich

'he pushed her down during an argument and rubbed a sandwich in her face'

'The newspaper says court documents don't detail the ingredients...'

**Hoser** · 03-10-2012, 04:55 PM

Yeah domestic violence is hilarious

**nosaj D:** · 03-10-2012, 10:46 PM

Fox 8? As in Fox news?

Thread: The frivolous news thread - for shitty news

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